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girl meets god
by La Veda Drvol
If you are looking for La Veda she might be at Kiwanis, a SHE planning meeting, or helping her husband Ron with Primetime, senior’s group. But if you want to see her passion, find out where she is speaking on recognizing God’s love and Grace in our lives. |
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If I were to write my life's journey it would play out like all really good love stories. In my case it would read: Girl meets God. Girl loses God. Girl Gets God back. And like all good love stories there is drama and betrayal, lies and hope, villains and heroes, pain and growth. Then as always at the end, "And they all lived happily ever after."
Girl meets God
To start my love story I need to set the stage. Born into poverty, life was a struggle. My father was an alcoholic, my mother was always angry, my brother was idolized, and my sister was blond and cute. The family was always undergoing some type of drama, with my father weaving in and out of our lives.
I did have two joys: my grandmother and church. My grandmother raised five sons and three daughters. I am not sure if she was truly patient or worn down, but her grandchildren could do no wrong. She taught me about love and kindness. And, she loved her Lord. As for me, I was about four when Jesus came into my life. I lived for Sundays when I could learn more of Him, but my understanding of Jesus was a little off. To me, He was a "she" as I had learned that men were cruel. I thought Jesus wore dresses and had long hair and soft eyes.
Girl loses God
But then we moved to another state and life got even more difficult. With the move, I faced problems that I had never had before. I found out we were poor. My clothes had no style, I had a "funny" accent, I went from the smartest in the class to being held back; and, worst of all, I could no longer go to my church.
The next three years resulted in more family drama, more abuse and more moves. This time when by father left we never saw him again. After that we started going to church again, but we were never part of the church's community. Step by step, I became more distanced from my earlier love: Jesus.
I felt I had no control of my life so I took no responsibility for it either. I suffered incest, abuse, rape, abandonment, unwanted pregnancies, a divorce, suicide attempts, and depression. For forty years, I wandered in my own desert lost, angry and sinful. At the age of fifty I found myself in a marriage that lacked any spiritual togetherness. But something was about to change.
Girl gets God back
Oh, this is when the story gets good. In the summer of '94 heaviness was on me; something was missing, something profound. It did not take long before I knew what it was. I missed God and that peace I knew as a child.
That summer I went to different churches in the area, but it was when I stepped into a little church called Inland that I knew I found something I could believe in. Unfortunately, soon after finding Inland, I became very ill. Within a month I was in the hospital and not responding to treatment. Each day, my breathing was getting weaker. While the doctors were scratching their heads, I was slowly fading. Then one day a pastor stopped by my room and asked if he could pray with me. Through my tears I said "yes." I prayed for forgiveness and hard-heartedness. There was no bargaining for my life, only repentance. I did not want to die without acknowledgment of my crimes against God. I thought that through all of my life's trials that God had abandoned me. Now I know it was me who walked away. That night was the first time my breathing improved. That night I dedicated my love and life to the Lord, no matter the outcome.
Eight months later I got my first test; it makes me think of Mr. Toad's Wild Ride. My daughter-in-law had our second grandson and I went to help her out. When he was born he had a major problem with his heart and within six weeks needed surgery. While I was still there I got a call from my daughter. Her husband was diagnosed with cancer and had less than thirty percent chance of surviving the year. Again, I got another call, and this time it was my niece. My sister was in the hospital with a blood pressure that was off the charts. My anger grew and I cried out, "Satan, you are not going to get me again. God loves me and He will make all things new again. So go away!"
After that prayer, all things did turn new. My grandson will soon be thirteen, my son-in-law is living cancer free and my sister lived another five years! What insight I lacked in my earlier years I now see; God’s hand was in each loved one's situation as well as in my own life. I now realize that God was probably behind the fact that my grandson just happened to live only ten miles from one of the leading hospitals for pediatric cardiology. Now how cool was that? On top of that, my son-in-law's illness helped my daughter grow from being self-centered to a loving, giving person. She saw her husband through a year of treatments and setbacks. God allowed my daughter to mature. As for my sister, God gave me a chance to minister to her and I was at her side until she went home to her Lord. What a blessing! And that was only the start! Another test came when I could not walk for over a year, and needed hip replacement surgery. God used that situation to help me to learn to accept help from others and stop being so full of pride.
The difference in my life is simple yet profound. I now know that Jesus loves me and will be there for me no matter what life brings. I have learned that God can use me to help others not in spite of what I have experienced but because of what I have lived through. Today I am His and He is mine. Each day I receive reminders of His love, love letters from Him to me. All I have to do is open my Bible and receive sweet whispers. He also speaks His love to me through others that follow Him. It is those love letters that encourage, correct and lead me. I can now truly say, "I understand" and "I know you will get through this" with compassion and empathy for others who are hurting. And now I, La Veda, am one of God's love letters.
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